Childhood

Favorite color as a child: brown*

*see interview of my brother asking me on his talk show

Best friend: my cousin

We barely talk anymore 

Favorite memory: watching lighting storms with my family 

Now half of them have moved out 

First kiss: age 6, next door neighbor 

He is getting married in two months 

Favorite hobby: singing karaoke to my friends

My friends don't know how much I love to sing and that I take lessons

change.

To whom it may concern

I don't know why but this quote keeps on running through my head tonight. Maybe I am suppose to share it because one of you needs it. If so, thank you for letting me share it with you. This quote has changed my perspective on life. 

So here you go. 

"You are enough, you are so enough, it is unbelievable how enough you are."

I didn't get this quote the first time I read it and I still find meaning today depending of my situation. I would suggest that you read it more than one to find one than more meaning of this quote. 

Thanks again for letting me share it. 

Sincerely,

Olivia Bea 

Are you ok

A good friend of mine asks me two to three times a day if I'm ok. She says it with a concerned look always. She is such a nice friend who is just looking out for me. But it bugs me. I feel like I am a very happy person but she said it to me like I have an illness. I honestly think it is just an innocent question from her but I can't figure it out, (the question and why it makes me mad). I want to be happy and I want to be happy with other people but this question of are you ok is always stuck in my head like I need to make sure at every moment that I am.

 I am ok. 

And I hope that I can get that through my own head soon enough that I can stop questioning if I am.

One brick

One brick decided that it wasn't important in the wall. 

It was like all the others.

The brick decided to crumble and the whole wall came down. 

We need all the bricks in life. We make up something much bigger than who we are but

People need us

And depend on us. 

They're is something much bigger than us alone. 

Don't become that one brick

We need you

City Love

I've never been in love with a person before, but I have been in love with a city. I think that even though love is different for everyone, the concept is universal so I hope to explain love through my city today.

New York City

I know that might sounds cliche to be in love with that city but their is just something about it that makes me giddy. Some days I'll see something, or hear a song that I listened to there that just sends waves of joy to me and it feels like my heart could burst. 

New York City feels like home. I remember that very distinctly after the first time I went, "home" just didn't feel the same.

 I don't love everything about NYC I'll be honest. But the overall feeling I get when I'm there is so much better than the few details that I don't love. 

You find something new every time you go to the city. It's incredible and you find store that are your favorite and you spend a lot of time there. Their are so many parts to New York that bring out different sides to you and you can just be yourself and you feel safe. I have so many dreams in New York and the city gives me the energy to reach them.

 I hope that their is some similarities with my city love and being in love with a person. I may be way off target but I hope to find out soon enough. 

A Coma

I wonder what happen if I was in a coma. 

Who would come visit me, would the word spread all over school, what would teachers think, what would my friends think, what would that boy think that I have been trying to get over for who knows how long? I'm not say that people aren't good people and would be like thank goodness she is gone for a bit I've been needing a break!(which if you feel that way then whatevs). Anyways, I really want to know what people would think. Would they think about it for a second or would some people (excluding my mom) lose sleep over it (not that anyone ever would) but what if my friend and I got in a fight the day before and they didn't know if we could ever make up. I'm not trying to offend anyone by this post and say we are concerned for others or looking for pity I'm just wondering if anyone would have regrets with any of our daily occurances with each other. I wonder if people would come visit me or if people would post a picture of us on Twitter with a hashtag that said #prayforoliviabea 

I also wonder what would be my first thoughts. Of course my family and getting back into reality but what about an hour later. Would I be thinking about my friend who I got into a fight with or that boy that I can't stop thinking about or who had posted about me? I wonder if my perspective would change and I hope that I wouldn't be so shallow to worry on who posted about me. 

But you really don't have to go through that to have a fresh perspective. You wake up everyday and maybe you had a fight the day before and a boy you don't know of was thinking about you and maybe it was your birthday and 3 people posted about you. Those post don't matter, you can make up with your friend, and you can finally take a risk and tell that boy. 

You don't need to wait any longer to start fresh. 

Finding One Hat

We all wear different hats everyday in our lives. (How many blog posts on hats have you seen start like this? Probably a lot but I hope to change you view on what this really means.) I mean their is the hat when you are around you friends, and the hat when you are around your family, and the athletics hat, work hat, student hat (that hat might be different for each teacher), etc. We are constantly changing our hats hour by hour, day by day and it is exhausting. 

Let's back up a little bit. When I was starting this post I had no idea what I was going to write on concerning hats. So I took to Pinterest (I'm basic) to look for anything I could that goes with hats. I found this really bad and cheesy looking decal on a wall that said "Home is where you hang yer (yes yer) (I know it makes me uncomfortable too) hat." It struck a cord in me and goes right in with my first paragraph. 

We need to wear the same hat all the time and we need to be constant with who we are. We don't need to be hanging up a different hat at the end of each day that we have been wearing, pretending to be someone. We should be wearing a hat that is comfortable to us and that we don't have to change really quickly when we are with someone. All of our hats look different but I have learned that I appreciate a person more when they can just be themselves no matter who they are around. You don't see many who have the courage to wear the same hat everyday (in fact most would think that is out of style) but I find it refreshing. I think all I'm really trying to say is: 

Be constant in who you are. 

Be constant in who you are.

Be constant in who you are. 

Figuring out high school

Things I never figured out in high school:

-How to get thousands of followers on Instagram/Twitter. 

-How to get a boyfriend. 

-How to keep a interesting conversation up when you are just texting someone (actually my worst nightmare is for a cute boy to constantly text me) (probably why they never did, word gets around I guess).

-How to wear a new and cute outfit everyday. 

-How to make a good impression on everyone you meet.

-How to be photogenic (please leave pointers in the comments below).

Things I figured out in high school:

-Naps are essential. 

-If you look out the window and look at the mountains before you take a test or even go into school, your day will be better.

-Your mom is your best friend.

-How to say sorry, and how to forgive.

-How you need a friend that you can always talk with. 

-Their is a world outside of Lone Peak. Just because you don't find a boyfriend or a good friend here doesn't mean you can't after high school.

-You will get as much as you put into a class. 

-You are enough, you are so enough, it is unbelievable how enough you are (my favorite quote). 

-Just because one person doesn't like you, does not mean that everyone won't like you either. 

-Just because you friends don't want to go somewhere doesn't mean that you can't. 

-Don't hid your passions and what makes you happy. You will only find true friends when you show your passions and they share them or support you (I had to learn this one the hard way). 

-Be your biggest cheerleader and be happy for yourself! The world can't wait to see what you do with your life! 

The list of things I didn't figure out, I don't really care to ever learn. But the things that I have figured out I wouldn't trade for a thousand followers on Instagram or for a cute outfit. Lesson that we learn for ourselves are engrained in our mind forever and stay with us. Remember that and go figure out what really matters in high school for you.